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My Battle With Obesity

October 05, 2006

I guess this was a long time coming. I've been overweight pretty much all of my life. I've dealt with being made fun of in school, the feelings depression, being ashamed of myself and I felt that all my life I've been fighting a losing battle. I've moved from being overweight to being obese. Once your BMI (Body Mass Index) moves above 30 you are considered overweight and the last time I checked my BMI was around 37. I was the heaviest I have ever been on the day of my wedding which was approximately 267 lbs. I was 97 pounds over what I should weigh. I figured out that I gained about 60 pounds since I graduated high school which was 9 years ago. It feels as though I've gone too far and that it will take another 9 years just to lose the weight that I've put on. I know that isn't true, but it is certainly what my mind tells me.

I have often thought to myself "It is too late, I will never be able to lose the weight." In fact I have tried diet plan after diet plan after diet plan after diet plan. When I was a kid my parents took me to see a diet specialist that tried to keep me on a strict schedule and diet. When that didn't work we tried several other diet plans. When those didn't work she put a lock on the freezer and hid the key. No kidding. Our freezer had a padlock on it because I was overweight. Obviously that didn't work either. So here I am years later finally coming to grips with the fact that I have an eating problem.

Night after night I would toss and turn in the bed thinking about all of the things I was doing to myself. I'm making myself a prime candidate for heart disease, diabetes, high blood pressure, and eventually an early death. Not to mention the fact that I constantly had a sore back, sore muscles and I literally was beginning to have a hard time moving or getting around. I had no energy, a complete lack of enthusiasm to do anything that requires physical activity. Every night I would have heartburn and I could never sleep on my stomach because I would wake up choking on my own bile and vomit. Honestly I was a sick individual. While the world goes on around me, I could hide in my dark little corner, consume all the wrong foods and all the wrong quantities and never really notice that I was killing myself. I honestly believe I was on the fast track to death.

Then I began to think about how unfair that was to my wife. Sometime in the future we would like to have children and I began to realize just how unfair it was to my future children. Then I realized how much it hinders my ministry. God may call me to do a lot of things, but when I'm sick and overweight and in the future when I'm dealing with the horrible consequences of that lifestyle I would have to sacrifice time and energy that I could be spending on ministry to deal with medical problems that I caused for myself. Obesity is no laughing matter. It is serious, it is life threatening, and I believe it is a sin.

Once these thoughts started to pierce my heart night after night I realized that God was trying to tell me something. I've thought a lot about holiness and Godliness and obedience and in the process I realized that when I'm looking at my life and dealing with my sin, my eating problem was one of many sins that has to be dealt with. While I realize that it is a sin whether I'm being convicted about it or not, I seriously came under deep conviction about this area of my life. I believe consuming large amounts of food beyond my physical need is the sin of gluttony. I've known that sin very well. I also believe that the large amounts of money that I've spent on feeding my own gluttony is poor stewardship of what God has given me. I believe that eating for reasons other than nourishment for the body and enjoyment (within reason) is also a sin. Eating because of depression, eating out of habit, and eating for other reasons causes us to place an unhealthy dependence on food. It's just like so many other addictions. Another reason I believe obesity is sinful is because it is harmful to the body. It's proven that those who are overweight have a higher chance of several well known diseases. Those who are obese have an even greater chance of dealing with those diseases. God reminds us that "your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God. You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body." 1 Cor. 6:19-20 . The context of this particular verse is sexual immorality, but I think there is a common principle to be learned by such a concept. Our body is the temple of the Holy Spirit and we must honor God with our body. This body was bought at great price, the blood of an innocent. So whether it's sexual immorality, alcohol, drugs, cigarettes, or overeating, all of these things are harmful to our bodies.

I am now determined to lose this weight. I've been encouraged by my pastor who has also lost quite a bit of weight doing the weight watchers program. There are a few others that have been successful with this program, so I decided to give it a try. I aslo had my wife get involved in it because I told her that I couldn't do it without her. She's been a tremendous help to keep me active and on track. About 4 weeks ago I started weight watchers and within 4 weeks I've already lost nearly 20 pounds. I'm determined to work hard at this until I lose about 50 to 60 more pounds. This is a tremendous goal I know, but with the help of my wife and my constant dependence on the Lord I know that I can be successful at it.

This really is the best diet plan I've done. The point system is relatively simple and it keeps me in my diet range without having to give up foods I love. I still eat ice cream. I still have steak. I still eat some potato chips. I can still go out to Red Lobster, Outback, Joes, and many of my favorite restaurants. I just eat far less food, I keep track of my points, I eat 5 fruits and veggies a day, I drink 6 glasses of water a day, I have my two milks and my two oils, I take my vitamins, and I do at least 30 minutes of exercise daily and I've been losing weight about every other day. It's a slow process, but if I keep at it I can reach my goal weight by July. If I stick with it I could lose 80 pounds by the time we go on mission trip in June and that is losing only 2 pounds a week. That is a goal worth fighting for.

To show how serious I am about this whole process, I just spend $450 for Kendall and I to join the local gym. That money was going to go for a new video iPod, but I found that this was more important. We work out about 5 times a week at the gym, taking time off on Wednesday and Sunday. I also spent $114 on the deluxe at home edition of the weight watchers material. Was borrowing it, but I finally decided I needed my own copy of everything. If I can lose the weight, it will all be worth the cost.

I will be keeping a bit of a journal on how my diet is going on my blog. I find that it will give me some accountability and encouragement along the way. I will also be able to chart my progress a little better by taking time to write about it. I can't afford the monthly fee for the weight watchers support group, so my blog will have to be the next best thing I guess.

I truly believe that this is the path God wants me to be on, and I believe that I will be far more effective in the ministry that God has called me to when I'm healthy and not dead. My wife deserves it. My family deserves it. And I believe most of all that my God deserves it. After all, he sacrificed his life for me. It's time I honor Him with my life and my body.

Comments

Posted by: Howie Luvzus
October 5, 2006 09:49 AM

I've been inspired by your post. Since Hurricane Katrina I have gained a great deal of weight. I've started to cut back on my calorie intake with the help of my wife.

Thanks again for reminding me that this is a spiritual issue as well. I'm headed to the treadmill now!

Posted by: Michael Morgan
October 5, 2006 03:54 PM

I could stand to lose a few pounds. Lets go running sometime. Or walking.

Posted by: Ken Pierpont
October 6, 2006 07:40 AM

Check out my blog... www.kenpierpont.com and look for the aritcle "How I Lost 105 Pounds." Also search "weight management tips"

God bless you
Ken

Posted by: Cygnux
October 6, 2006 02:20 PM

Thank you! Both to you and Ken Pierpont(I read his blog too but could not comment on it). I too struggle with obesity and often wonder sometimes if its not to late. I won't go into the long sob story but in November is my second hip replacement (right, now left). Problem is arthritis but excessive weight sped up the deterioration. I'm only 39 and facing this much earlier than most. But your words of inspiration have let me know that its never too late to turn from sin and confess it! My sin of gluttony had kept me in bondage for years and although I've known this, I've avoided really thinking about and fully confessing it till now. Please pray for my weight loss success as I will pray for yours also! I owe it to my family to fix this problem and become the family spiritual leader God demands of me.

Blessings!

Tim

Posted by: Weight Watchers Guy
October 10, 2006 06:55 PM

Weight Watchers works great if you have a good reason to lose your weight and it certainly looks like you do. I know that I used to have the same feelings in the middle of the night as you although it was not about losing weight but instead at the time it was about my smoking. Any significant change is hard and uncomfortable but once you make that change internally it will change your life forever and with a path these changes are not nearly as hard as we would expect. I quit smoking about 10 years ago and have never had to look back.

I wish you luck in the changes that you are going through.